Well, as you people may have noticed, I am a girl. And I am so glad right now, so thankful to God, that I wasn't smothered away inside my mother, never to breathe, that I am loved, cared for, and have never been completely unwanted from 18 years.
There are two kinds of people I recently met. No names will be mentioned but you can assume and imagine with your free will, as I am sure, most of you will know at least a certain neighbour, watchman, carpenter, servant or friend having told you about something along these lines.
The situation was- There was a pregnant woman. And she had just had her baby. It was a girl.
Wait, that does not do justice to the situation. There was a woman who was going to be a mother, 9 months in the making, with hopes, dreams and wishes for her unborn child. She talked to her slowly inflating belly, she ate, walked, slept, even breathed taking care that no harm and only good happened with the foetus (that's what it was back then). She felt the connection, the happiness, that a person to carry her and her beloved husband's legacy forward, would be entering this world soon. She underwent pain, discomfort, morning sickness, swollen body parts, weird mood changes for it. And then the day arrived, the day to be celebrated as a birthday for years to come, lots of balloons and gifts and cake. She smiled as the doctor laid her down on the operation table, smiled in spite of the pain, the absolute agony she suffered, knowing, someone she loved was about to arrive, with a loud wail. The moment came, the moment before it having a swollen but numb belly, a lot of blood, loud beeps of machines and anxious doctors all talking about her, and the next moment holding a deflated belly, and a new life in the world. This middle moment was it, the miracle. And then she slept, sedated to a happy sleep. The baby wailed and the doctors sighed in relief knowing their job was successfully done, sutured her wound and the pediatrician took the baby away for some basic checks. The baby was fine, healthy, happy, crying and oh yeah, a girl. Now the family was invited in.
The first scenario- The maternal grandparents come in. They have expectations and excitement on their faces. The doctor tells them that its a girl and congratulates them. They instantly look like a light has been switched off on their faces and a sudden poker straight face appears, the kind that says 'no drama in public, this will be taken care of in the privacy of our home'. The mother is shifted to her ward, her parents dragged there, and they don't even spare a smile for the lifelong transformation from a woman to a mother that their daughter has under gone. The baby lies wailing in a room for another hour, fawned over by nurses from the hospital, and a small girl whose mother works in the hospital, walks up to the baby and talks to her and tells her how cute she is, and plays with her. Oh, and the dad? Didn't bother to take a day off to visit the birth of his first child. The mother wakes up later, sees that she has a daughter, fills up with love for her daughter and fear for both, her daughter and herself. She dreads facing her husband, in-laws, oh and even parents.
The second scenario-The paternal grandparents, the father, and 2 brothers of his walk in. They all are expectant, excited and exhausted, having had a night out with the to-be mother. The pediatrician tells them, its a girl, congrats. Their faces instantly brighten up with a sudden beaming light, they start immediately asking a hundred questions on when they can get sweets and feed the mother, when they can play with the baby, when they can leave to celebrate. The grandmother has had only sons and desperately wanted a granddaughter, and now she plans on what to get her granddaughter and her daughter-in-law. She goes and sees to it her daughter-in-law gets the best amenities and care, and is the first to lift her granddaughter, the minute she is allowed to. The mother wakes up later, to find 10 people all there to congratulate her and be happy for her. She gets happy, knowing she and her daughter have a loved and happy future.
These, both being witnessed by me recently brought so many things into perspective. Lets just for a minute focus on the newborn from the first scenario here. How will she feel, about 24 years from now, when she sheds tears as she leaves her home to go become another person's wife, that her life had begun being unwanted by the people she now cries for? I do not know how the grandparents and father will live with themselves, for every time she achieves, they live in the knowledge she was neglected by them at birth, every time she brings them joy, they know they did not care for her when she was most vulnerable, tiny and in need of them.
This mentality of so many people in India amazes me. These fathers would never be born, had their grandparents aborted their mothers or thrown them at some train at birth. The grandmothers would be a lot happier with their granddaughters had males not have always made them feel inferior and tortured them to an extent that they felt afraid for another girl who was about to enter the world. The point I am making here is something my mom brought to my notice. And sorry about the bio-overdose, but give this a thought.
Males have XY chromosomes, and women have XX chromosomes. When they have a kid, the woman gives an X chromosome, to every baby she has, girl or boy. The father gives one of the two, if its an X, its a girl, and if its a Y, its a boy. When the males (for I shall not call them men, men they are not!) themselves are responsible for the decision as to which sex the baby has, how can they and their families blame their wives, who just carry and deliver the baby? Also, how do they expect themselves or their sons to ever get married, and to get a wife or daughter-in-law to boss over if all people want and get sons? Even from every angle other than the humanitarian one (this angle does not apply to these heartless monsters), there need be no bias in gender. There is loyalty, purity, affection and beauty in a daughter, and there is care, security, love and support from a son. There need be no bias, but the way most of the rural, and ridiculously weird part of India is going now, educated and/or sensible classes are going to have to wish for daughters, so that they can keep the human race thriving. So kudos and respect to the family in scene two, who have now a new treasure in their life, a treasure they can all love for a lifetime.
Have a look at this guys! Outrageous :(
http://www.ryot.org/photos-these-women-were-doused-in-acid-for-turning-down-marriage-proposals/559641
There are two kinds of people I recently met. No names will be mentioned but you can assume and imagine with your free will, as I am sure, most of you will know at least a certain neighbour, watchman, carpenter, servant or friend having told you about something along these lines.
The situation was- There was a pregnant woman. And she had just had her baby. It was a girl.
Wait, that does not do justice to the situation. There was a woman who was going to be a mother, 9 months in the making, with hopes, dreams and wishes for her unborn child. She talked to her slowly inflating belly, she ate, walked, slept, even breathed taking care that no harm and only good happened with the foetus (that's what it was back then). She felt the connection, the happiness, that a person to carry her and her beloved husband's legacy forward, would be entering this world soon. She underwent pain, discomfort, morning sickness, swollen body parts, weird mood changes for it. And then the day arrived, the day to be celebrated as a birthday for years to come, lots of balloons and gifts and cake. She smiled as the doctor laid her down on the operation table, smiled in spite of the pain, the absolute agony she suffered, knowing, someone she loved was about to arrive, with a loud wail. The moment came, the moment before it having a swollen but numb belly, a lot of blood, loud beeps of machines and anxious doctors all talking about her, and the next moment holding a deflated belly, and a new life in the world. This middle moment was it, the miracle. And then she slept, sedated to a happy sleep. The baby wailed and the doctors sighed in relief knowing their job was successfully done, sutured her wound and the pediatrician took the baby away for some basic checks. The baby was fine, healthy, happy, crying and oh yeah, a girl. Now the family was invited in.
The first scenario- The maternal grandparents come in. They have expectations and excitement on their faces. The doctor tells them that its a girl and congratulates them. They instantly look like a light has been switched off on their faces and a sudden poker straight face appears, the kind that says 'no drama in public, this will be taken care of in the privacy of our home'. The mother is shifted to her ward, her parents dragged there, and they don't even spare a smile for the lifelong transformation from a woman to a mother that their daughter has under gone. The baby lies wailing in a room for another hour, fawned over by nurses from the hospital, and a small girl whose mother works in the hospital, walks up to the baby and talks to her and tells her how cute she is, and plays with her. Oh, and the dad? Didn't bother to take a day off to visit the birth of his first child. The mother wakes up later, sees that she has a daughter, fills up with love for her daughter and fear for both, her daughter and herself. She dreads facing her husband, in-laws, oh and even parents.
The second scenario-The paternal grandparents, the father, and 2 brothers of his walk in. They all are expectant, excited and exhausted, having had a night out with the to-be mother. The pediatrician tells them, its a girl, congrats. Their faces instantly brighten up with a sudden beaming light, they start immediately asking a hundred questions on when they can get sweets and feed the mother, when they can play with the baby, when they can leave to celebrate. The grandmother has had only sons and desperately wanted a granddaughter, and now she plans on what to get her granddaughter and her daughter-in-law. She goes and sees to it her daughter-in-law gets the best amenities and care, and is the first to lift her granddaughter, the minute she is allowed to. The mother wakes up later, to find 10 people all there to congratulate her and be happy for her. She gets happy, knowing she and her daughter have a loved and happy future.
These, both being witnessed by me recently brought so many things into perspective. Lets just for a minute focus on the newborn from the first scenario here. How will she feel, about 24 years from now, when she sheds tears as she leaves her home to go become another person's wife, that her life had begun being unwanted by the people she now cries for? I do not know how the grandparents and father will live with themselves, for every time she achieves, they live in the knowledge she was neglected by them at birth, every time she brings them joy, they know they did not care for her when she was most vulnerable, tiny and in need of them.
This mentality of so many people in India amazes me. These fathers would never be born, had their grandparents aborted their mothers or thrown them at some train at birth. The grandmothers would be a lot happier with their granddaughters had males not have always made them feel inferior and tortured them to an extent that they felt afraid for another girl who was about to enter the world. The point I am making here is something my mom brought to my notice. And sorry about the bio-overdose, but give this a thought.
Males have XY chromosomes, and women have XX chromosomes. When they have a kid, the woman gives an X chromosome, to every baby she has, girl or boy. The father gives one of the two, if its an X, its a girl, and if its a Y, its a boy. When the males (for I shall not call them men, men they are not!) themselves are responsible for the decision as to which sex the baby has, how can they and their families blame their wives, who just carry and deliver the baby? Also, how do they expect themselves or their sons to ever get married, and to get a wife or daughter-in-law to boss over if all people want and get sons? Even from every angle other than the humanitarian one (this angle does not apply to these heartless monsters), there need be no bias in gender. There is loyalty, purity, affection and beauty in a daughter, and there is care, security, love and support from a son. There need be no bias, but the way most of the rural, and ridiculously weird part of India is going now, educated and/or sensible classes are going to have to wish for daughters, so that they can keep the human race thriving. So kudos and respect to the family in scene two, who have now a new treasure in their life, a treasure they can all love for a lifetime.
Have a look at this guys! Outrageous :(
http://www.ryot.org/photos-these-women-were-doused-in-acid-for-turning-down-marriage-proposals/559641
Comments
Post a Comment